Long Live the Teenage Babysitter
Here's how we can all do our part to encourage interested teens (not just girls!) to participate in this labor market.
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I’ve been thinking a lot about a recent Atlantic article written by Faith Hill, dramatically titled, “Don’t Tell America The Babysitter’s Dead.” (gift link) In it, she explains that non-adult babysitters are disappearing due to a combination of factors: teens are too over-scheduled to have time to babysit and/or they are deemed “not responsible enough” by their parents or potential clients. This a symptom of how we are raising kids with minimal responsibility, and few opportunities for independence. Another trend at play is teens working for pay has been on the decline for decades (not just in babysitting), partially due to the hectic demands of extracurriculars that are part of the competition to get into a “good” college. Consciously or unconsciously, parents may deem it a better economic investment for high schoolers to forgo paid work in favor of what they deem more prestigious “resume builders” like travel soccer or math team, which they bet will pay off more in the long run.
My first reaction to this article is that all of the macro trends Hill points out are correct, however, the scale of the decline is highly regional and can vary widely by community. In my experience, while they probably have more scheduling conflicts than 20 years ago, there are plenty of eager teen babysitters roaming my mid-size North Carolina city. I think within our communities we should all do our part to encourage all interested teens (not just girls!) to participate in this labor market. Here’s why:
Parents need a break: Given the sky-high cost of regular childcare and our (often!) grueling work and caregiving demands, it can be daunting to seek out, vet, train, and schedule an adult stranger babysitter even for a few hours off. So let’s flood the labor market! Having more teen babysitters available where you know their parents, they live in your neighborhood, or they come recommended by a friend, takes some of the daunting mental load out of getting time off. Also, unlike professional adult caregivers, they aren’t going to require minimum time blocks or any kind of regular commitment.
It teaches boys and girls to value care: Just like how working in a restaurant can make people forever appreciate servers and train them to always leave a good tip, helping teens understand that caring for kids is both a real job and has value, may help them respect this labor throughout their lives.
It can model great things for younger kids: Having responsible figures in your kids’ lives who aren’t quite adults is wildly alluring and models for them how they can grow their sense of responsibility and independence as they get older. It also gets them thinking about ways they can earn money in the future.
Here are some ideas I have for how we can come together to make this happen:
For parents who need babysitting:
Start small: Teens need to build up their experience and confidence, and it will probably go better if you try out a new teen babysitter on easy assignments first, get to know them more, and work up to longer stretches with more difficulty. For example, having them “couch sit” i.e. watch TV or do homework after you put the kids to bed yourself so you can go out for a few hours. This is one of my favorite teen assignments. Also, trying them out for an hour or two while you work out or run errands if your kids are awake is a good place to start.
Pay well: I personally don’t believe that you need to pay a teen the same as you would a professional adult caregiver, but that doesn’t mean you should try to get them at a ridiculously cut rate. Make the job feel valuable and worth it to them, which will probably also help with their availability, as they’ll prioritize sitting for you. We are generally paying teens $15 an hour to make sure the house doesn’t burn down while the kids are asleep, or do something really easy like play video games with our oldest. This is a pretty good deal for them, so we often get a “yes” when we ask. This rate might need to be higher in bigger cities. (Feel free to weigh in in the comments.)
Always ask around: Whenever I meet a middle schooler or above, regardless of gender, I always ask if they babysit, even if I’m not actively looking for someone. I file it in my mental Rolodex or take their number for another time if they do. Also, if they don’t babysit or haven’t considered it, it plants a seed for them about babysitting as a viable job option.
Here are some things parents of older kids/teens can do to encourage them to get into the babysitting ecosystem:
Start leaving them home alone: This is going to vary by your kid’s maturity level, (and unfortunately some states have ridiculous laws about this) but your kid needs their own independence challenges if they are going to be responsible enough to be a babysitter. Start by teaching them how to make simple meals on their own, give them simple tasks to do while they are home alone, leave them in charge of siblings for short jaunts, etc, so when they are old enough to babysit, they’ve already practiced at some of the skills.
Don’t pay for everything for your teens: There are many teens from families that have little disposable income or kids that are already motivated to save on their own for college or other necessities. But regardless of your family’s economic status, one of the best ways to get teens interested in participating in the labor market is for them to realize they aren’t going to be handed everything they want so they have to earn money to buy it. I think more around spending money and allowance has changed a lot in a generation or two, and I’m totally pro-going old school and telling kids that earning money and saving is the only way they are going to get $300 sneakers/new game console/designer jeans/Apple Watch, etc., etc regardless of how well-off the family is.
Encourage teens to start putting babysitting on resumes: just like LinkedIn has added unpaid caregiving as one of the options of their “career break” feature, we should encourage kids to make visible their experiences as babysitters, and explain to them that it has value and translates into other job markets if they aren’t interested in professional care fields. I would much rather hire someone who had on their resume “Most sought after babysitter in Morehead Hill,” and “was responsible for the safety and well-being of kids ages 1-8, led creative activity programming, provided excellent communication and customer service to parents.” To me, all of that is way more impressive than “social media intern.”
Alright, Double Shifters, I’d love to hear from you. What’s your experience with teen babysitters these days? Do you use them? Why or why not? How do you find them? Does your teen do it? I welcome all thoughts on the state of teen babysitters in 2024.
I'm in Los Angeles. We have a 13 year old watch our 6 year old. She has a little sister who went to preschool with ourchild. Our previous teen babysitter, who is now 17 and too busy with school etc., handed out cards at the neighborhood Halloween party when she was 13. Our child LOVES these babysitters. I think he sees them as big kids who are not quite adults.
Let's not forget the biggest perk of all: the best contraceptive there is! My daughter is adamant about not having children every time she comes home from babysitting!