The How to Find Your People Club: An Intro

I want to spend the year helping you build meaningful IRL connections.

Today, I’m proud to officially launch The How to Find Your People Club, an IRL community-building project for the 21st century.

Americans are desperately lonely, and our isolation is impacting our health, happiness, longevity, and even our politics. But this is far from hopeless. In fact, I’m quite hopeful that it’s possible to change this, and I want to be part of a movement to reconnect our disconnected nation. I hope you’ll join me.

Over the next year, this newsletter will feature public posts on topics like the difference between community and friendship, how to break free of gendered time constraints, wildly unexpected places to find meaningful connection, overcoming anxiety around social settings, and how important dinner parties are for foraging relationships (and how to throw one without getting overwhelmed) just to list a few. Be sure you are subscribed for all of this goodness.

In addition to 1-2 public newsletters per month, paying club members can expect:

• Self-reflective community-building prompts, quizzes, and games (I’m amped about the games!!)

• Dedicated threads and chats (members can even start chats!)

• Monthly virtual hangouts

• An optional Find-a-Friend IRL matching program (coming this spring!)

The club aims to teach and empower you to find and invest in communities IRL wherever you are. Club members will get years-early access to some of the groundbreaking ideas and tools I’m developing for my book, which will be published by Penguin Random House in 2027. Also, YOUR stories and experiences will inform my reporting. I’m excited about this two-way street. 

Here are some FAQs about the How to Find Your People Club

When does it start?

Tomorrow, February 6th 2025, I’ll send my first email to club members outlining our planned activities for February.

I’m already a paying Double Shift member. How do I get into the How to Find Your People Club?

Double Shift Membership and How to Find Your People Club are merging into one paying program for the year. No need to sign up for anything twice. If you are already paying for a Double Shift membership, you are in! Membership gets you access to everything.

I read the Double Shift for feminist content on family life, gender equality, and care issues. Will you no longer be writing about those things?

I will never stop writing about these things, and my years of research on care, gender, and motherhood will be deeply infused into my content this year. Part of why I got interested in writing about community building is because I don’t feel like we can change our society to value care until we break out of our silos of isolation and build up our personal communities. Community-building deeply challenges the status quo of American life, and I believe it is the only way we can make meaningful social change, especially around care.

What if I don’t join right at the start, or I don’t have time to do the exercises right away? Is it still worth joining?

Yes! Membership gets you access to an archive of past posts and exercises so that you can go at your own pace or dip in and out.

What if I can’t make the hangouts? Will they be recorded? 

We’ll be hosting hangouts on the last Wednesday of every month. If you can’t make it, the audio of the event will be distributed to members afterward.

I’m really interested in this, but I can’t afford a membership right now. Can I still participate?

If cost is a barrier and you want to participate, email me at askthedoubleshift@gmail.com, and I’ll set you up. 

Who is the club for?

Anyone and everyone interested in IRL community-building is welcome.

Have other questions I didn’t answer? Ask them in the comments!

Feb 26 at 1pm ET: Member Hangout Welcome! 

(HYFYP Club virtual hangouts will have a standing time of the LAST Wednesday of every month at 1pm ET if you want to mark your calendar now for going forward!)

For our first club hangout, I want to get to know club members, hear what you are hoping to get out of the club, and share more about what you can expect in the coming months. We’ll also do a short exercise around taking stock of what we are looking for in current or future communities.

Zoom link will be shared with club members!